“You should really try to
get some rest.”
My nursemaid had refused to
leave my side for more than a few moments at a time. She insisted on
sitting at my bedside and dabbing my face with a wet cloth despite
the fact that it was effectively doing nothing. I had tried to reason
with her that she didn’t need to keep refreshing the water and
moistening my face, but in the end it didn’t hurt me and it seemed
to make her feel better so I let her do it without a fuss. It was
somewhat nice to have her doting on me, tucking and re-tucking me in,
it reminded me of when I was very young and would come down with a
fever or the sniffles.
“I feel like all I’ve done
is sleep,” I groaned.
“Then it’s what your body
needs right now,” she said with a sagely nod, “no one gets better
by sitting up and fretting about their illness. Your body wants you
to sleep, so it’s best that you do, you will heal much heal faster
that way.”
“I don’t know if it’s
that’s simple,” I sighed. I had a deep, uncomfortable feeling
that magic was at play and that rest, while it felt like I needed it,
wasn't going to fix anything in the end.
“Of course it is.” She
clicked her tongue and donned a very matronly expression. “You’ve
been through quite a lot and that nasty woman went too far too many
times. Once was too many times,” she muttered angrily, “but
repeated injuries have made it even worse. If we do not choose a time
to rest and let our body heal, the body will choose it for us.”
On any other health mater I
might have conceded to her point, but this didn’t feel like just a
simple physical issue that would mend with some rest and rich food. I
had been a fool to mess with using my power to the extent I had, as
much as I loathed to admit it, the cleric had been correct in her
warnings not to extend my powers without someone to monitor.
“When is the healer
arriving?” I asked as I let my eyes wander up to trace the cracks
in the ceiling.
“Soon, I hope,” she
replied with a long sigh. “I told Martha to send for the one that
nursed your father through a very bad fever when you were very young.
It was very touch and go with him that winter, but the doctor was
able to get him to pull through and have him back on his feet when we
all thought he was a goner. If anyone in this kingdom will know what
to do it will be him.” She turned her attention to the basin once
again and dipped the rag into the bowl, then squeezed the excess
water from it before placing it on my forehead and applying gentle
pressure. “It will feel like he will get here much sooner if you
just close your eyes and rest. Remember how I used to convince you to
sleep the night before your birthday by telling you it would make it
come quicker?”
“Of course and you were
right, it did make it feel like it came quicker.” I had figured out
it had been a ploy just to get me to sleep when I was still fairly
young, but it still worked. I would cover up my head and lay begging
my body to sleep despite being excited so I could wake up the next
morning and run downstairs to see what exactly had been bought for me
that year.
“Now close your eyes and
pretend it’s your birthday tomorrow. I won’t move an inch while
you sleep and be right here for you.” She positioned the cloth to
comfortably lay over my eyes, then wrapped her hand comfortingly
around mine. “Nothing is going to happen to you on my watch.” She
cleared her throat and her voice cracked slightly. "I won't let
anything happen to you again, I may never forgive myself for not
fighting for you at the very start of this whole terrible ordeal."
I was glad for the cloth over
my eyes, it hid the tears welling up. “Okay, I will try to sleep
now,” I murmured.
I didn't know what else to
say, I didn't feel like I had the strength, physically or emotionally
to try to comfort her in the moment. While I always just told myself
she was mostly just a servant who had been tasked with raising me and
was just kind to me, she had spent more time with me than she had any
of her actual children. I felt close to her in a way I hadn't my
parents and it pained me to know that she was so upset.
Between the cool cloth, the
comforting hand on mine, and the nursemaid’s soft humming of a
lullaby I was asleep within a few minutes. My dreams were muddled
masses of feelings and emotions, the scenes more than just images and
sounds. It felt like I was free falling endlessly into a dark void
where I could sense things just beyond my perception but couldn’t
move or do anything to gain any clarity. There was an itchy tingle in
the back of my consciousness that told me I was being watched, though
I didn’t know how or by who. The feeling made me uncomfortable and
no matter how much I fought to try to focus and make out anything in
the undulating darkness, I was left ignorant and unable to do
anything but let what would happen, happen. I had settled into a sort
of unhappy comfort with the situation when a feeling of impending
doom griped my chest, like I had suddenly become aware that I was
rapidly accelerating towards the ground. I tried to thrash and fight
uselessly and screamed silently into the void around me.
“Easy, easy,” said an aged
male voice that cut through the darkness, “I’m here to help you.”
I couldn’t place the voice.
It wasn’t someone I had heard before and the sudden presence of a
voice made me feel even more uneasy.
“I need you to wake up,”
they said gently, but sternly.
Wake up? Right, I had gone to
sleep, this wasn’t real, I needed to wake up and get out of the
nightmare I was stuck in. It felt so real though, like it had invaded
my consciousness and taken me hostage. Maybe I would stay in the
dream forever, be doomed to fall endlessly in a space where time no
longer mattered.
“Florin!”
A violent shake brought me out
of my dreams with a great gasp of air. My lungs burned and my neck
hurt from being violently whipped back and forth.
“Oh thank goodness,” my
nursemaid screeched, voice near a hysterical scream. “I thought we
lost you!”
“I’m okay,” I managed to
mutter out. My own voice felt distant and foreign like someone was
pretending to be me in the same room.
“Now you are,” the man
muttered, pulling my shoulders forward and forcing me to sit up. “Get
the pillows piled up behind him, no more sleeping flat.”
The nursemaid jumped into
action, hastily stuffing pillows behind me while I groggily tried to
stay awake. The allure of giving in and going back to sleep was
strong, almost like something was beckoning to me, whispering how
wonderful sleep would be if I would just let it overtake me once
more. Even though I was still very much out of it, I was conscious
enough to be terrified that there was obviously something very, very
wrong with me.
This book's true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.
“I
can’t see!” I exclaimed as the realization wafted through me.
“We’ve got to get him more
conscious,” the man said.
I let out a startled yelp as a
spray of cold water drenched my face and front of my sleeping gown.
Instantly I began to shiver and my teeth chattered together, it felt
like I had no body heat of my own left. The shock unfortunately did
not return my sight.
“He’ll catch a cold like
that!”
“I can cure a cold, but I
need him to be alive first.”
My blood ran cold and I
started to make a concerted force of will to break through the groggy
haze that was enveloping me. Maybe this is what it felt like to die
and I wasn’t going to go down without a fight. I started by
wriggling my fingers and really paying attention to the feeling of
the fabric beneath them, then I started focusing on the cold water
soaking my clothes, then the smells of my bedroom, taking every
avenue I could to try to connect my mind and body back to the real
world and convince it to leave the dreams behind. Slowly my sight
returned, the nothingness replaced by blurry splodges of color that
slowly came into focus. An older man whom I had never met before was
staring at eye level with me, his lips set into a firm, worried line.
“Coming back to us?” he
asked.
“Uh huh,” I replied
weakly.
“Good, your eyes look more
focused so I think you’re out of the worst part of it.” His voice
sounded so calm and in charge that I couldn’t help but feel a bit
safer.
“Coming out of what?!” The
nursemaid was still near hysterics.
“That’s something I’m
going to be working on figuring out,” the man soothed, “nothing
to worry about for now, he’s back and with us.”
Blinking my eyes rapidly a few
times helped me to further surface and I felt connected enough to
bring my hands to either side of me and lift myself up enough to
readjust my position to something a bit more comfortable. Sadly my
legs still sat as dead weight, they were refusing to wake up with the
rest of me.
“Do you think you’re well
enough now to answer some simple questions for me?” the man
questioned.
I nodded to who I was going to
assume was the healer who had been sent for me. He seemed about the
right age, old enough for deep set wrinkles to have invaded his
forehead and all of his hair to be an ashy white. Most healers had to
be decently advanced in their age before they were truly trusted.
Poor peasants might have to accept a young apprentice to assist them,
but only the most elderly and experienced healers would attend to a
royal.
“Have you been more tired
recently?”
“Of course he has,” the
nursemaid answered for me, “that nasty woman tortured him and
broken his body more times than I can count.”
The healer turned to her and
smiled gently, but firmly put a hand on her arm. “I need you to let
him speak for himself right now, it can be dangerous to have words
accidentally put in his mouth or him not tell me some symptom. The
best help you can be right now would be to take this bowl.” He
paused, picked up the now empty water basin and gently placed it into
her hands. “Take it to the purest water you can find, nothing
that’s been sitting around the castle for too long, directly from
the well that you draw yourself most preferable. Fill it up, then
bring it back. Before you do though, make sure you find the cleanest,
softest cloth you can, the more pure and soft the cloth the better
it’s going to help our young lord.”
She looked to me with concern
and alarm, clutching the bowl to her stomach, but slowly she turned
towards the door and left the room to complete her mission. As soon
as the door closed softly behind her she broke into a quick jog,
frantically wanting to complete her assigned tasks as quickly as
possible.
The healer let out a long sigh
through his nose, but there was a smile on his face. “Sometimes the
hardest part of helping someone heal is getting people who mean well
but are going to get in the way doing something that makes them feel
helpful in a non-obstructive way. It would be helpful to me if when
she comes back with the cloth and water that you really seem to
appreciate the cool water on your face and perk up a bit if you’re
able to every time she comes back after I have her change it out. I
know it’s not doing much, you know that too, but she doesn’t need
to know that. Alright?”
“I can do that,” I agreed.
It was an ingenious solution that was an overall positive for
everyone involved, I could see why he was widely regarded as the best
there was in the kingdom.
“Good, now back to my
question: have you been feeling more tired lately?”
“Yes,” I answered, “I
took a very long nap early today, then I fell asleep again in a chair
while I was working with the royal scribe. Particularly with the
scribe I found it harder to wake up than what would be normal, he
seemed concerned about it too.”
“Concerned?” the man
raised his eyebrow in a questioning expression. “What was he
concerned about?”
I furrowed my brow trying to
remember his exact words, but found they had melted away from all the
grogginess and disorientation from the dreams. It frightened me that
I had so easily forgotten, it was not like me to start forgetting
things that happened not so long ago.
“Something about how I was
sleeping really deeply,” I answered.
“Having trouble with memory
as well,” he said to himself, a contemplative look on his face.
“I guess so, though that
doesn’t worry me as much as the fact I can’t walk anymore or feel
my legs at all for that matter.”
“That will be the second
problem we tackle,” he said, “you stopping breathing in your
sleep and having a strong desire to return to sleep is a much more
pressing issue.”
“I stopped breathing?” I
asked in alarm. My heart pounded in my chest, what I had felt was the
thick, suffocating embrace of death trying to drag me down. Perhaps
it hadn’t been simply a dream at all.
“Let’s not panic, no good
will come of that. It could be because you were laying flat, some
people simply can’t sleep flat or they risk stopping breathing,
though it is a bit worrying if you were doing similar while sitting
up earlier.” He paused and felt around my neck, gingerly working
his way around from the base of my jaw down to my collar bones. “Any
congestion or cough recently?”
“Not at all, I don’t feel
ill at all really, just groggy and sleepy.”
He nodded as if he already
knew the answer, but had to ask anyway to make sure. “What about
this business your nurse was talking about? Someone has been physical
with you?”
I really didn’t know where
to begin and part of me did not want to air all my dirty laundry to
someone who I just met, but when faced with the idea that I had
already almost died and he was trying to stop it from happening
again, I decided to suck it up and tell everything. The words spilled
from my lips and it ended up being easier to talk about than I
thought, I suppose at some level I wanted someone to know everything
and maybe understand. Part way through I started to wonder if he
would even believe me, it all sounded ridiculous at some points, but
his serious expression never wavered and he kept nodding his head to
indicate that he was listening and processing.
“That everything?” he
asked once I had finally run out of things to say.
“I think so,” I said
quietly, anxious if he would believe all of it or not. If I was in
his position I wasn’t sure that I would.
“Overall this might be a
touch out of my expertise,” he said, “but I might know someone
who can help a bit better.”
“You believe me?” I said
in shock.
“What is there not to
believe? The part about magic being real and such?” he replied with
a soft smile. “I’m a healer, I’ve seen things happen that I
can’t even begin to explain with normal logic. I’ve seen people
I’m sure were possessed, mangled limbs that straightened themselves
out over night, and blind people who got touched by someone with a
‘gift’ who could then see again. I long ago stopped believing
that reality was so cut and dry to be only the things I can
personally see and feel. This woman I’m going to send for to come
advise treatment for you, she spent one day with someone I was sure
was going to be dead by dawn and by dusk the next night they were up
and about their normal life like nothing happened. She claimed that
she could heal them when I couldn’t because she had abilities that
I do not, I’m inclined to believe her, so let’s have her take a
look. If there is something like magic at play she’ll be able to
help you much more than I can.”
I swallowed hard, but gave my
permission with a shallow nod. The horror that I was perhaps already
too far gone for even a very skilled healer rose in my chest.

