My day continued, I arrived at school with Nanano. The other girls were waiting for us there. It’s time for a new die. Despite my trying to be happier today, I feel as if something bad is going to happen at any moment.

  I can’t expin it. I can’t expin it.

  “You are te Nanano!”- Horiki’s sister waved at us.

  “Did you 2 miss the bus?”- Her friend spoke next. She is focused on her phone, possibly texting someone.

  “No, we walked here. It was pretty fun.”- We proceeded to walk to our cssroom.

  We took our seats but Nanano and her friends had to go somewhere.

  I just checked my phone quickly. I forgot about it but I registered on a website named Suicide Sanctum. In my world that was a pce where suicidal people could gather, they could share suicide methods there. I was talking to someone who is under the name ShadowOtaku, they tended to change their name. But this person I ter found out that this was named Hikaru Tanaka, the same Hikaru Tanaka I met in the other world, I knew about his sister Hana, their situation was complicated, with Hikaru’s severe mental issues he couldn’t remember much. From what I could gather from what Hikaru said when he was saner was that Hana’s parents were friends of their family and they died, and Hana was raised with Hikaru.

  In reality, Hana’s mother is Hikaru’s father's former wife. They split up shortly after Hana was born and Hikaru’s dad married another woman. They divorced because his father had an affair with that same woman during the time he and Hana’s mother were married. I know this because of what will happen next at school. Nanano will bring this up and I will see younger Hikaru and Hana with my own eyes ter that day.

  I am derailing too much. The main reason I made an account on Suicide Sanctum in the first pce was to find methods to kill myself, but all of this was turned on its head the day Nanano came into my life. I didn’t mention this to anyone but I have a stash of poison in my room back at home. Stuff I can prepare in a few minutes to die a quick death. I don’t think I will need to use them. The way I am now, with people like Nanano, my wish to die seems to lower, it’s not entirely gone.

  “Hey, Ayame, we are back. What are you looking at?”- Nanano peeked at my phone, she looked concerned. I forgot that I left my phone on Suicide Sanctum and my messages to Hikaru were visible.

  “What did you see?”- The other girls tried to approach me and look at the phone.

  “It’s between me and Ayame. Trust me on this one, ok?”- She smiled before sitting near me. Her eyes were locked on my phone and the messages, I didn’t know what to do. I felt ashamed to have such a site open.

  “Let me look through them. And sorry. I didn’t know it was that bad for you”- She put her left hand on my shoulder. I gave her the phone. She scrolled and looked through all of the messages that I sent to Hikaru.

  “It’s sad. I know that kid. Well, he isn’t a little kid he is about 12 or 13. His family situation is unique. It’s hard to expin. My family is good friends with theirs.”- Nanano's face looked at my phone without expression.

  At first, Hikaru was on the website out of curiosity, I chatted with him a little when he was sane, but I did chat with him in the year that his sanity lowered. Due to me being born early in the ear and a few years behind my cssmates I am the younger one.

  Despite how much I like to tell myself that I am 17, I am still 16 years old. I don’t know why I did this. Even in my memory, I continue bad habits.

  The timeline wasn’t making sense to me when I was telling myself I was 17. I would be 17 next year. My life would continue for almost 2 years, maybe 1 year and 7 months since New Year’s is 5 months away from today and I was born in the first week of January.

  “I will tell you more in the breaks.”

  We waited for the teacher to enter the cssroom.

  She was preparing something on her ptop, it’s quite unusual for her to do this. But whatever. We spent some time completing a paper on what we would do if kids from other schools came to visit our school and spent a few csses in our cssroom. I know where this is going, we are going to get a visit from middle schoolers or kids that want to choose a high school.

  The css gave the papers back to the teacher, it didn’t take too long for us to fill in the details on them.

  “Well, as you could have guessed from this questionnaire, we will have visitors shortly. I am going to take a few from this css, other csses will be participating.”

  The entire css was silent for a few minutes. The teacher proceeded to look at our answers.

  After 10-20 minutes she rose from her chair.

  “Well. I will take, Nanano, Ayame, Fuyuno, and Fuyumi”- She pointed to each one of us. I never cared to get the names of Nanano’s friends. Horiki’s sister is named Fuyumi and the other girl is named Fuyuno. I don’t know too much about them as of now.

  Guess this is a good time to get to know them more.

  I guess it’s time to stop dreaming for a few minutes. Hikaru had been experiencing dreams like these where he could see his past life and actions. I don’t have a good theory of why they happen, but I do have an unsupported theory.

  I will get into that when my memories will repy the moments of my “death” in this world